Ayisha Qureshi

Life is complex. And with complexity the beauty is that it is almost impossible to generalise. Categorising people, events or relationships, for example, is a big No No. Making sweeping statements the likes of “this always happens to me” or “I am never lucky” is also not a good idea. However, when it comes to things that should NEVER be done, I believe in following a few rules. Here’s my top ten NEVERS in life:

1. Never run from anything. Not only does it grow and become bigger, both metaphorically and literally, but it also manages to overshadow everything else that you turn to.
2. Never equate a part of your life to the whole. Any part of your life is just that- a part- whether it is your job, a problem at the job, your friends, and your family and so on. Keep putting this in perspective- there is no problem that effects the whole of your life (until of course you are dead, or really sick).
3. Never give up. Ever. Especially never give up hope. Keep looking for solutions, for a way out, for the light at the end of the tunnel. And you will find it. Try to become part of the solution.
4. Never be rude. Neither to older or younger people, nor to the rich or the poor and nor to strangers or acquaintances. Even when you are really, really upset with someone. Make it a rule. You will avoid a lot of heartaches, your own and the other person’s.
5. Never ignore your instincts. Even if you can’t act on them right away, don’t ignore them. In fact, the least you can do is become cautious. Soon you will be able to understand that uneasiness that pushes you to postpone that argument you were planning to have with your boss and that investment you were planning to make actually were pointing towards something.
6. Never be ashamed of your roots, your family and your beliefs. They make you who you are and what you will become. No use running from that. Where are you going to go?
7. Never be dishonest. In your dealings with people, at work, especially with yourself. I read somewhere (can’t remember where!!): honesty is not the best policy, it is the ONLY policy. I believe it and try to live by it.
8. Never skip breakfast. I know- after all the life lessons seems a bit non-serious but you will not only make better decisions on a full stomach but also lose weight, eat healthier and start your day off in a much more pleasant mood.
9. Never discuss religion when sitting in a group of friends/ colleagues etc. Not only is it a sensitive subject for everyone (Atheists included) but there is rarely anything appropriate that you can say to make all the awkwardness go away.
10. Never say never. Do not generalise people, situations and rules- to name a few. Each situation has different dynamics, every new person comes from a different place and brings a new perspective. You can’t colour code or label them. It’s just wrong.