Ayisha Qureshi

Growing up I used to love researching “successful” people- superstars, rich moguls, entrepreneurs, consultants and so on. I wanted to know if there was a single formula which all of them applied and followed in their lives. Then I found these innumerable books on success, more specifically the likes of “Ten rules of success” and “What to do if you want to be successful” and so on. It was as if the exact recipe of success had finally been discovered and was available to anyone interested. Well, to my surprise not many people seemed interested. Next came the YouTube, Instagram and Facebook and you had all the rules and tips for success available in short posts under 10 words- daily inspirations and reminders. Again, with views counting in millions, these posts did not seem to be very effective. What was going on??

After all these years of keen observation of the so called “successful people” and lots of reading about success in life, here’s my take on it:

1. Success to different people will mean different things. For me, a kind person with character will be more of an inspiration than a rich person with a red Ferrari who might inspire my teenage daughter far more. Understand what success means to you and keep revisiting the concept. It will help you stay grounded.
2. What success will mean to you will depend largely on the life you have lived, the childhood you have had, the voice of your parents in your head and how personally you see yourself as successful. The standard you hold yourself against will determine when you will finally see yourself as successful and give yourself a little credit.
3. For some of us, unfortunately, that time never comes because of the unrealistic expectations from ourselves. If you are one of those people, first recognize this flaw and then think about what is a more realistic approach to success.
4. Money or power alone can never equate to success- Never. Instead, it is the ability to make a difference that is true success. Whether you are able to bring about positive change in the life of a single human being, or start a chain reaction in the right direction- this is what comes closest to success.
5. If after a long day, you are able to relax and find contented sleep, well, congratulations then, you are successful. It doesn’t matter if you sleep in a mansion or a small apartment- the quality of your life is defined by the quality of sleep you are getting.

For me success has always equated to contentment. Well, not always. I also had to rethink my definition of success. And it came down to stability (mental, physical and financial), understanding a deeper meaning of life, looking at the bigger picture always and taking one day at a time. And smiling, lots of smiling.